Month: November 2016

a new article

Since when do they have orgies, and why aren’t I on the mailing list? We don’t have wings, we just skate around with perfect hair fighting crime. Bonnie and Clyde, they wanted fame, notoriety, and boy did they get it. They also got dead. Let me pour you a big frosty mug of ‘shut-the-hell-up.’ Battle wounds are nothing new to me, preacher. Say! look at you! You look just like me! We’re very pretty. Did you know that the only animal in the animals crackers that has clothes is the monkey? She is the slayer. Anyone in this much pain prays, or at least curses.
It’s not a road trip. It’s a covert operation. They’re just a bunch of hormonal time bombs. Everybody started singing and dancing. Barmaid, bring me stronger ale, and some plump, succulent babies to eat. For this plan to work, River and I will have to be dead.
Last month he’s the freak with jicama breath who waxes his back. If you can’t do something smart, do something right. It’s about power and it’s about women and you just hate those two words in the same sentence, don’t you?
Hey, no, we’ll just set course for Planet of the Lonely, Rich, and Appropriately Hygienic Man. You will keep a civil tongue in this house or we’ll put your tongue in a stew. Buffy’s boinking Spike. Can’t even shout, can’t even cry. The news isn’t there to tell you what happened. It’s there to tell you what it wants you to hear or what it thinks you want to hear. The only thing Willow was ever good for, the only thing I ever had going for me were those moments, just moments, where Tara would look at me and I was wonderful. You shut the hell up right now or so help me, I’ll shut you up.
I find it a bit sad that you think of yourself as a candidate for anyone’s fantasy. Instead you go all Dumbledore on me. Actually, I was fired from a fry-cook opportunity.
Why not default them with ninja skills or whatever? I hate to bring up our imminent arrest during your crazy time, but we gotta move. I’m a rogue demon hunter now.
I think calling him that is an insult to the psychotic lowlife community. I sort of met you, I mean, I watched you while you were sleeping. I mean, I was, I was present while you were unconscious, from the ice. No, Angel, it’s not you. See if you were really a witch, you’d do a spell to escape. Can everybody just notice how much fire I’m not on? Everyone’s a hero in their own way, in their own not that heroic way. My entire existence was constructed by a sociopath in a sweater vest; what do you suggest I do?
Sweetie, if he had a tussle with that Sasquatch, we’d be in the dirt right about now, scooping up the Captain’s teeth. Oh my god, I find lentils completely incomprehensible.
Say, aren’t you leaving a hole in the middle of some soggy group hug? Boy, when they were handing out school spirit, you didn’t even stand in line, did you? Okay, at this point you’re abusing sarcasm. You shut the hell up right now or so help me, I’ll shut you up. Oh my god, I find lentils completely incomprehensible.
I’ll never leave. Not even if you kill me. It’s like somebody slaughtered an Abercrombie and Fitch catalog. Either blow us all up or rub soup in our hair. It’s a toss-up. Now you can luxuriate in a nice jail cell, but if your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet: I will end you. Oh Spike, devour me! You always hurt the one you love. Ah, the pitter patter of tiny feet in huge combat boots.

270sounds

It’s like somebody slaughtered an Abercrombie and Fitch catalog. I’ve seen the best and the worst of you. It’s about power and it’s about women and you just hate those two words in the same sentence, don’t you? Bonnie and Clyde, they wanted fame, notoriety, and boy did they get it. They also got dead.
Military people don’t make out with science people. Any self-respecting demon should be living in a pit of filth or a nice crypt. How did you find me here? You’re the one freaky thing in my freaky world that still makes sense to me. Anything for you, because I love you. Deep, deep man love. How about ’cause you’re a tiny impotent Nazi with a bug up his butt the size of an emu? In the time of gods and monsters, what is the worth of a man? Now you can luxuriate in a nice jail cell, but if your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet: I will end you. It’s a real burn, being right so often.

new private

You’re lesbians, so the hating of men will come in handy. For this plan to work, River and I will have to be dead.
They are come to the killing floor. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I heart my porn, but this is cool! Welcome to the future, where cars fly, robots serve our every whim, and genetically engineered dinosaurs rule the Earth. It’s funny how the Earth never opens up and swallows you when you want it to. Spike follows the exciting smell of blood and we follow the fairly ripe smell of Spike.
Eyeballs to entrails, my sweet. Imagine Bonnie and Clyde if they had 150 years to get it right. My egg is Jewish. How did your brain even learn human speech? I’m just so curious. Big damn heroes, sir. With any luck, he’ll poke the wrong one and end up in an alternative dimension inhabited by a fifty-foot Giles that squishes annoying teeny pirates. Well, you were busy trying to get yourself lit on fire. It’s my estimation that every man ever got a statue made of him was one kind of sommbitch or another. I gave birth to a pterodactyl. Uh, thermal exhaust port’s above the main port, numbnuts.

new free

You’re gonna die screaming but you won’t be heard. These are stone killers, little man. They ain’t cuddly like me. How did you find me here? How did your brain even learn human speech? I’m just so curious. Eyeballs to entrails, my sweet. Xander, that’s not the North Star, it’s an airplane. Say Skywalker, and I smack ya. So, she’s added cussing and hurling about of things to her repertoire. A whole mess of sparrows turning on a dime, salmon trucking upstream.
The gentlemen are coming by. What gives you the right to suck face with your demon lover again? I wanna hurt you, but I can’t resist the sinister attraction of your cold and muscular body! They need to take seven and they might take yours. All the protein, vitamins and carbs of your grandma’s best turkey dinner, plus fifteen percent alcohol. Oh my god, I find lentils completely incomprehensible. With any luck, he’ll poke the wrong one and end up in an alternative dimension inhabited by a fifty-foot Giles that squishes annoying teeny pirates.
My entire existence was constructed by a sociopath in a sweater vest; what do you suggest I do? Yeah, well, I’m not the one who wanted Wind Beneath My Wings for the first dance. Hey, no, we’ll just set course for Planet of the Lonely, Rich, and Appropriately Hygienic Man. I’ve got a theory, some kid is dreaming, and we’re all stuck inside his wacky broadway nightmare.

unprotected

Stay away from hyena people!!!!!!1 or any loser athletes, or if you see anyone who’s invisible. I suppose there is a sort of Machiavellian ingenuity to your transgression. I just don’t see why everyone’s always picking on Marie-Antoinette.
I am never gonna see a merman, ever. I knew you were lying. Undead liar guy. Like, is the hippo going,’Hey, man, where are my pants? I have my hippo dignity!’ I was actually at Woodstock. That was a weird gig. I fed off a flower person, and then I spent the next six hours watching my hand move.
Can everybody just notice how much fire I’m not on? Okay, at this point you’re abusing sarcasm. I wanna hurt you, but I can’t resist the sinister attraction of your cold and muscular body! I think calling him that is an insult to the psychotic lowlife community. I’ve seen the best and the worst of you. And now the one person who should be here is gone, and a waste like you gets to live. Little man loved fire. Why can’t you just masturbate like the rest of us? I love what you are, what you do, how you try. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they’re too busy with their own.